Monday, August 20, 2012

Augusta Opens Floodgates

At long last, the Augusta National Golf Club will admit female members. In an announcement today, the host of the Masters Championship will invite Condoleeza Rice and businesswoman Darla Moore to wear the famous Green Jacket. As if driven by momentum, Augusta Chairman Billy Payne declared the following list of other new members, all of who were previously ineligible:



  • Sith Lords

  • Members of Pussy Riot

  • Clemson alumni

  • Wisecracking robots

  • Julian Assange

    McKayla Muroney Unimpressed wtih Augusta National
  • Bankrupt Facebook investors

  • McKayla Maroney

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