Thursday, April 26, 2012

Miss DR Not a “Miss”!

Another controversy has hit the hallowed halls of the Miss Universe pageant. On the heels of the explosive Miss Canada sex-change scandal that forever changed the way the contest defines gender comes another challenge to the sacred Rule Book.

Recently crowned Miss Dominican Republic winner Carlina Duran has been forced to relinquish her title after organizers discovered she is in fact married! The lovely 25 year old fitness professional hid her marriage of nearly three years even going so far as to lie on her contest application.

“This is an unforgivable transgression,” said Dominican pageant director Megaly Febles. “It’s one thing to change the rules to recognize transgendered participants as women. The very definition of ‘Miss’ is to be unmarried. You can’t just reverse that with a surgeon’s scalpel.”

Since the Dominican Republic’s second largest export (with the first being professional baseball players) is pageant queens, the country regards beauty contest rules violations very seriously. Mrs. Duran will be sentenced to three years hard labor housekeeping at a coastal all-inclusive resort.


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