Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Claiming there is "too much diversity" among the remaining Republican presidential candidates, financier, real estate developer and philanthropist Henry F. Potter has thrown his hat into the ring. "It's not just enough to be conservative, old and white," his press release claimed. "You should also be really rich and intolerant to be a good candidate."
Despite having missed the Iowa caucuses and New Hampshire primary, Potter believes he can catch up in time for the critical Bedford Falls caucus in February. Dogs & Jeans sat down with the reclusive billionaire in this exclusive interview:
D&J: Mr. Potter, what do you see as the biggest problem facing the average American family?
Potter: No securities, no stocks, no bonds. Nothin' but a miserable little $500 equity in a life insurance policy.
D&J: Can you be more specific with your criticisms of the other candidates? Let's start with Mitt Romney.
Potter: Playing the market with the company's money?
D&J: Okay, you don't sound sure about that. How about Rick Santorum. What's his weakness?
Potter: It's a woman he's involved with. It's all over town that he's been giving money to Violet Bick.
D&J: Newt Gingrich?
Potter: He's worth more dead than alive!
D&J: Many people might look at your candidacy as a personal attack on President Obama.
Potter: He was no business man.
D&J: So you are critical of his fiscal policy? Do you disagree with the budget compromise he fashioned that kept the government running last year?
Potter: Why didn't he go to the riffraff he loved so much and ask them for the $8,000? You know why? Because they'd run him out of town on a rail!
D&J: What would you say if you could debate the President?
Potter: Look at you. You used to be so cocky. You were going to go out and conquer the world. You once called me a warped, frustrated, old man! What are you but a warped, frustrated young man?
D&J: Bold words. Thank you for this interview Mr. Potter and good luck with the campaign.
Potter: And Happy New Year to you, in jail!