Know Your Korean Dictators

For many years, the North Korean propaganda machine has kept the world informed of Kim Jong Il's nearly super-human abilities (sexual prowess, feats of strength, dulcet tenor voice etc.) In the wake of his death, more secrets are being revealed about this reclusive Man-God:

• He was the director's first choice to play the role of Jethro on TV's "Beverly Hillbillies".
• Felt Iranian leader Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was "a bit of a loose cannon."
• His touch could turn base metals into gold. Solid gold records that is!
• Actress Jessica Lange once called him "Asia's answer to Mikhail Baryshnikov."
• His battle with anorexia prevented him from competing in the Men's Downhill event at the 1998 Winter Olympics.
• A long standing feud with Snooki prevented a "Jersey Shore/Pyongyang" edition of the MTV show.
• The Snuggie? His invention!
• Kristin Wiig's signature character Gilly was originally performed by Il after a late night cabinet meeting.
• Through sheer will power, he could reverse the flow of blood in his arteries and veins. It is even rumored that he once caused his left and right eyes to swap places.
• John Bon Jovi used to call him to ask for lyrics that rhyme with words like "roses", "prayer", "glory" and "orange".
• He came this close to seeking the 2012 US Republican presidential nomination.