Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Ask Your Republican Candidate

The GOP Presidential nomination race moves to the next level with the CNN Western Debate coming to you live from sunny Downtown Las Vegas. To enhance your viewing of teh showdown, and to promote voter participation, we invite you to read Dogs & Jeans' Original GOP Drinking Game (Patent Pending).The rules are simple. Please keep in mind the game is presented for entertainment purposed and wagering is strictly prohibited.


For tonight's debate, the editors of Dogs & Jeans were asked to vet Anderson Cooper's list of questions. The following inquiries were removed for being prejudicial, inflammatory or just plain stupid:
  • "Should the seven of you be set adrift at sea in a lifeboat, what's the under/over on Michele Bachmann going completely bat-shit and eating her own foot?"
  • "Mormons are not Christians. Discuss."
  • "If your polling determines you cannot defeat President Obama, would you withdraw from the race and support another candidate who could win? Someone like Ronald Reagan?"
  • "Who wants to invade Mexico?"
  • "Herman Cain has suggested a 9-9-9 tax plan to boost the economy. Can anyone else arrange three numbers or letters to create an even catchier program?"
  • "If you could be any tree, which tree would you be?"
  • "Let's play the Supreme Court Justice Edition of "Marry, Fuck or Kill" : John Roberts, Elena Kagan and Clarence Thomas."
  • "If you could be any pizza topping, which topping would you be?"
  • "Please describe your three-point approach to restricting the influence of special interest groups in Congress. Please be specific if your plan includes the use of witchcraft."
  • "Have any of you taken home a really hot chick only to find out she was a dude?"
  • "When will the time for talking about our problems be replaced by action to solve our problems, or at least talking about the problems of someone else. Someone like Canada."
  • "What steps would your administration take to restore Lindsey Lohan to the level of celebrity she deserves and America so desperately craves?"
  • "Ron Paul, will you sit on Rick Perry's lap, let him put his hand up the back of your shirt and pretend you are a ventriloquist dummy?"
  • "Complete this song lyric: I've got a brand new pair of roller skates,..."
  • "Which country is a worse ally: Israel or Germany?"
  • "If I said that Newt Gingrich plan for health care reform include leeches and the use of Buddhist relics, would you be more or less inclined to support him?"

4 comments:

Julianna said...

We were just watching the debate... I like your questions better. :)

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