Monday, August 29, 2011

God Hates Bad Taste

Michele Bachmann's comments last week that Hurricane Irene was God's wrath fell on the heels of a similar statement about the earthquake on the eastern states. Her campaign was quick to deny that the congresswoman was serious however, these were not isolated incidents. The potential Republican presidential nominee has suggested numerous times that some earthly events came about as a deliberate act of God:
  • The Tsunami in Japan was God's displeasure at the increasing number of Japanese players in American professional baseball.
  • Jake's expulsion from the mansion on "Bachelor Pad" was to punish everyone for declining attendance at Sunday worship.
  • Periodic outbreaks of Bird Flu serve to remind us that God prefers Americans to eat Texas beef.
  • The continued struggles by the Oakland Raiders and San Francisco 49'rs is God's retribution for California's continued tolerance for "liberal" lifestyles.
  • The recent rise in mortgage rates is an affliction brought about from buying foreign cars.
  • SARS was Gods way of punishing us for watching "Who Wants To Marry A Millionaire?" and "The Swan".
If Bachmann is correct, we can only fear what will be coming for all those seasons of "Jersey Shore".

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