With tomorrow being Thanksgiving, Dogs andJeans will post Friday Demotivational posters a day early and feature a Thanksgiving theme. This way, readers will get to digest it for an extra day. Get it? “Digest it” because of all the turkey and stuffing? Isn’t a joke better when you have to explain it? As usual, there will be plenty of boobs and people hurting themselves.
So for today, I’d just like to post a few things I’m thankful for this year.
I’m thankful Bristol Palin did not win Dancing With The Stars. I don’t have anything against her, and she really did improve but she was certainly not the best dancer. If she had won it would have meant that the judges’ opinions and the quality of the performances were irrelevant as long as you had an organized campaign. However, her electoral success should be a warning to anyone who thinks her mom doesn’t have what it takes to be president. She has money and a well run organization behind her and that is all it takes.
I’m thankful not to live in either of the Koreas. Why can’t they just settle their dispute with a Tae Kwon Do Tournament?
I’m thankful I don’t have to fly anywhere today. It’s not that I don’t enjoy waiting around for 6 hours for my chance to be groped by a stranger, it’s just that I can’t help wonder what purpose any of it serves. How do airport security staff sleep at night? Isn’t there job to catch terrorists? How many terrorists have any of them caught? You’d think that for every 10 innocent nut sacs they fondle they should catch one terrorist. That’s a ratio I think America could handle.