Monday, July 27, 2009

How to Prevent Your Date From Leaving Early

"Making Out" is as much about ambiance as it is desire. Even the most ardent of lovers can have their desire diminished by a poor environment. Unflattering lighting, uncomfortable furniture and weird smells all contribute to an unsatisfactory encounter, or even the cancellation of intimacy altogether.

Perhaps no factor is a bigger killer to "The Mood" than the choice of background music. Everyone has their favorite "Make Out" artist or genre, but even generally accepted masters of the form the Lionel Richie have a "Dancin' on the Ceiling" to dampen the heat established by "Three Times a Lady" or "Endless Love".

Dogs & Jeans Crack Relationship Advisor save complied a list of music to keep as far away from your play list as possible if you want to score a little action:

  • "Brand New Key (The Roller Skate Song)" - Melanie Safka, 1972

  • "I'm Gonna Wash That Man Right Outa My Hair" - South Pacific, Rogers and Hammerstein, 1949

  • "Mexican Radio" - Wall of Voodoo, 1982

  • "Happy Birthday" - Various

  • "Who Let the Dogs Out?" - The Baha Men, 1998

  • "I've Never Been to Me" - Charlene Duncan, 1976

  • "Ode to Billy Joe" - Bobby Gentry, 1967

  • "Because I Got High" - Afroman, 2001

  • "I Wish I Was an Oscar Meyer Weiner" - Ad campaign, 1965

  • "Hava Nagila" - Various

  • "Turning Japanese" - The Vapors, 1980

  • "Ballad of the Green Berets" - Barry Sadler, 1966

  • "Cotton Eyed Joe" - Rednex, 1994


Swirl Girl said...

I wish I knew this in when I had Melanie blaring from the reel to reel waaaaaay back when.

Cocotte said...

That first song was hella annoying! But the Mexican Radio and Turning Japanese, while not mood setters, would not turn me off. Then again, I'm usually horny :)

Fancy Schmancy said...

I can't tell you how many make-out sessions had to be cancelled when Hava Nagila came on. Who can kiss AND clap their hands and stomp their feet and sing at the top of their lungs all at the same time?

Youngblood4ever said...

What if I sang Happy Birthday like Marilyn Monroe? Would have be a good makeout song?

Trooper Thorn said...

Swirl Girl: I think she might have done a duet with Barry White though...Baaabyyyy

Cocette: If it is true you could keep your libido up during "Mexican Radio", you could likely do it in a slaughterhouse.

Fancy: Plus there are always grandparents and weird old aunts around when "Hava Nagila" is being played.

Youngblood: Hmm, hadn't considered that. Good "outside the box" thinking.

Cocotte said...

No need to get nasty, Trooper!

Trooper Thorn said...

Cocette: Nasty? It was a compliment. I am easily distracted (kids, dogs, clouds etc.) So my hat's off to you.

Remo said...

I once knocked up a chick while groovin' to "The Chicken Dance" song.

Man, was the caterer PISSED when he cleared THAT table.

tammy said...

Are you speaking from experience?

Trooper Thorn said...

Remo: Did you ask one of the bride's maids to hold her hair while you did it? Because that's classy, Man.

tammy: No, I usually put on a video of "Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom." That always sets the right mood.